There’s something beautiful about the way the Universe brings lessons to life. I’ll read a phrase that speaks to me in the paper (ok, let’s be honest- on Facebook), then I’ll hear almost exactly the same thing come out of someone’s mouth a few days later, then an opportunity to coach someone on that same topic comes up in my workshops or with one of my private clients… these things keep happening and then it clicks for me: I’m getting a message!

Lately, the message that’s been opening up for me is how small my dreams are when I make them about me. If my vision is just about me, it literally can’t be much bigger than my physical body. What a waste of a life!

On the other hand, I can focus out. I can make my vision not just about what I want for me, but what I want for the world. I don’t set out upon the grand adventures of my life because I want to keep the results for myself (although, I do want them as well). I do it because I want everyone to benefit from the fruits of my labor. The money I will make from selling my next book, for instance, will be a wonderful byproduct of creating opportunities for breakthroughs and learning for the rest of the human race.

I was observing one of my mentors in a workshop this past week, and he talked to a lot of people directly about their dreams. He kept saying, “there’s too much YOU in there.”

What?! If it’s MY dream, shouldn’t I be in there, somewhere?

The good news is, you are! We tend to think that we must “fix” or “prepare” ourselves before we can turn our dreams into reality – as if we must first have it in our hands before taking action or giving it away. The truth, however, is that when you focus out, the changes you wished to see in yourself come more effortlessly than you ever thought they could.

Want clarity? Support others in finding clarity. Want unconditional love? Love unconditionally. Want more money for your work? Focus on fulfilling your purpose in this world to the greatest extent possible, and the money will come.

You can choose, instead, to toil over incremental progress as you focus only on yourself. Totally up to you.

Of course, being specific about what you DO want (not what you DON’T want) for yourself is important. The key is to be incredibly specific about what you want and then let go of the results (what it will “look like” in the end).

Here are the steps I often coach people to use:

1. Set a very specific goal that is clear enough to withstand reinvention, and put it all in writing.
1A. Make a vision board of it (This one is optional, but it always supports me when I do it).
2. Decide what the first step is going to be when you take action (there’s no need to know EVERY step from A to Z from the start – a plan can support you, but you don’t know what you don’t yet know).
3. Commit yourself to creating what you want for yourself in others.
4. LET GO of how it will look, and choose to be open to the possibilities you might not have even been aware of.
5. Take action.

There is a difference between being committed to a result and being attached to exactly how it will look. When you let go of your need to control what happens or be right about things, everything comes together.

And if you aren’t BEing what you want to create in your life and sharing that with the world, it most likely won’t happen. Having money doesn’t make you rich – BEing rich does. There are a lot of poor people in this world who have plenty of money. There are also a lot of people who are rich in life, spread that richness to others, and don’t have all that much money.

So, how big is your dream?